I Was Love Bombed for 9 Years: He’d Shower Me with Affection Then Smash Me into Pieces
Love bombing, a tactic used by perpetrators of domestic abuse to confuse and control their victims, has been highlighted in new guidance for domestic abuse prosecution. In this article, Bryony* recounts her experience of being love bombed by her abuser for 9 years. Her name has been changed to protect her identity.
Bryony had known her abuser for years, and they had always been friendly. He was funny, charming, and charismatic. After a meal, they started talking and texting every day. Bryony thought he liked her and wanted to see where things went. However, a few weeks later, he started putting pressure on her to formalize the relationship. He would say things like, “I’m falling for you, I hope you feel the same way.” Bryony felt it was too much pressure, but he told her that he didn’t want to waste his time. Eventually, Bryony agreed to be with him and see what happened.
Her abuser would contact her regularly, asking about her day and showing her attention. Initially, Bryony enjoyed it but eventually realized that he was keeping tabs on her. He wanted to know where she was, who she was talking to, and what she was doing. He was digging for information he could use against her to control her.
Bryony’s abuser knew she had a rough childhood, and he exploited her vulnerabilities. He would say things like, “I’m going to love you, care for you, and change because of you.” Bryony felt that he was being too full-on, but she wasn’t alarmed yet. The love bombing continued for three months until her abuser started being nasty. He would drag her up the hill with love and affection and then kick her down when she was at the top.
If Bryony challenged him on his behavior, he would tell her that she was crazy, and nobody would believe her. Despite all this, their relationship continued. When Bryony fell pregnant with their daughter, her abuser’s need for coercive control increased. He put pressure on her to change her religion and lifestyle.
Her abuser would write cards on Mother’s Day and birthdays saying how lucky they were to have her, and on other days, write abusive words on Tesco receipts. He made Bryony feel special only to tear her down. Her abuser wanted control, and he never let his guard down.
– Love bombing is a tactic used by perpetrators of domestic abuse to confuse and control their victims.
– Perpetrators of domestic abuse use tactics such as isolation, coercion, gaslighting, and financial control to control their victims.
– Domestic abuse can happen to anyone of any gender, age, race, religion, or sexual orientation.
Bryony’s story highlights the insidious nature of domestic abuse. Perpetrators of domestic abuse can use love bombing to confuse and control their victims. Victims may not realize they are being abused until it is too late. If you or someone you know is experiencing domestic abuse, please seek help.
Domestic abuse is a serious issue that affects millions of people worldwide. Perpetrators of domestic abuse use various tactics such as love bombing, coercion, and financial control to control their victims. It is essential to raise awareness and provide support to victims of domestic abuse. No one deserves to be abused, and everyone deserves to live in a safe and loving environment.
*Name has been changed to protect identity.